Friday, June 26, 2009

feeling good

Bloating, bruising, and headaches aside, I feel really good both emotionally and physically. Maybe the doctors do know a little something about taking a cycle off between IVF attempts. Or maybe I feel invigorated because it's Friday, and the sun is shining (a truly rare event in the northeast this month), and the strawberries are still fruiting (I've made 3 strawberry rhubarb crisps already) and the wild blackberries will ripen soon (pie!). Regardless of where it comes from, it feels good to feel good. I'm still obsessed with TTC and IF, but I've become so comfortable with that obsession that I'm no longer obsessed with obsessing. That may not make any sense, but it's the truth. I guess I could say that I am comfortable with the fact that it has come to this. THIS is how babies are made, in our life, so THIS is what we're doing. THIS is our reality. It's not the best reality, but it's ours and we're doing what we can with it. There's no point wishing it were different- it is what it is. And dear God, I hope THIS works.

Bloodwork tomorrow. I suspect the daily monitoring will commence shortly thereafter.

1 comment:

Hope Endures said...

I like what you wrote about not obsessing over obsession. It sounds like you are in a really healthy place. I hope this cycle turns out to be it for you! Fingers crossed!! (ICLW)